Whitney Is Right

Hello, Blog. I have neglected you this past week, callously ignoring your cries for attention, shrugging off your emails and intricately crafted macaroni necklaces (painted my favorite shade of apple green), the jewelry, the flowers and singing telegrams. We are like two ships, passing in the night. On different nights.

A customer called in today, demanding to dispute her hair drug test results. She'd tested positive for cocaine and had, on an earlier and separate occasion, also tested positive for cocaine. Aside from there being nothing to dispute, the lab also confirmed - when we called them later - that there was no mistake. There aren't any medications that will give a false positive for cocaine usage, and definitely not in the amounts she was testing at. In sum, she high. She ranted and raved for awhile, then eventually hung up. I wondered if she'd realized suddenly that, wait, she had been using cocaine! And I wondered if that moment of realization was just as jarring and slightly more horrifying as realizing that you are naked in public.


"Crack is whack." --Whitney Houston

I realize things like that all the time about myself. The other day, I found out that I am the president of Burundi. Before that, I found out that I was a unicorn. Now I'm a content writer/phone butler for TestCountry.com and I have two-and-a-half hours left at work.

Here are more sources on cocaine and cocaine addiction:
Focus Adolescent Services
National Institute on Drug Abuse
Cocaine-Effects.com
StreetDrugs.org
CocaineAddiction.com